But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Randomize