the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
