in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
