shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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