were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
