hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Randomize
