Say something about gay babies.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
