I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
