Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
