Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
