school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
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