Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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