Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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