i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
