why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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