at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
