Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
