Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
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