I don't think brook has ever known best
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
