butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
