ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize