I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
