I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Randomize
