i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I am naked and annoyed.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
