The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Randomize
