Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Randomize
