You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
