I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
When are your genitals available?
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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