He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
