on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Let's get the cat blown out
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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