I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
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