He had one of those small greek statue penises
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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