Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
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