He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
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