I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Randomize
