The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
