On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
