your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
he just fucked me for my cheese..
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
