I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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