I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Randomize
