Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
