It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
