There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
