i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Randomize
