David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Randomize