is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
