just come out here and I will go home with you...
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
