:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
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