We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
