Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Randomize
