question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
The uberlube is also flammable
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
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